Let’s Reclaim Our Public Space For Childhood By Kelly Grehan 

By Kelly Grehan

Barely a day goes by without my hearing a member of the older generation decrying the children of today:

“We never used to sit in on devices all day”

“All they want to do is stare at screens”

“We used to spend all day outside.”

It is as if children today are of a different species from their senior relatives, who speak of some sort of famous five style childhood. 

While I strongly suspect their memories of the past are somewhat rose tinted I also strongly suspect one reason children do not play outside is that they simply are not welcome.

In my own area (Dartford), many of the green spaces we played on in the early 90s are now occupied with signs saying things such as ‘no ball games’ or ‘this is not a play area’ and have been filled in with bushes to stop any fun activity taking place.

Although we are fortunate to have several good parks in our area, taking children to the park is a time consuming business and not one that can be done every evening for most children.  

When children used to ‘play out’ the benefits were multiple: children made friends with the same children who shared their streets, developing close bonds, isolation was therefore less, the feeling of belonging, and community was embedded and the benefits of being outdoors are well known. 

Dozens of studies from around the world show regular time outdoors produces significant improvements in attention deficit hyperactivity disorder, fighting obesity, improved learning ability, and creativity and better emotional well being.

Unstructured play in the outdoors has also been shown to boost problem-solving skills, focus and self-discipline. Socially, it improves cooperation, flexibility, and self-awareness.

However, the disconnect with nature is now so strong that more children are taken to hospital having fallen out of bed than out of a tree. 

In fact one fifth of all children report never having ever attempted to climb a tree and a similar number have never visited a farm.

 And it not just outdoor space often denied to children now, with libraries lost in many towns along with community centres, church halls and youth clubs, for those whose parents are unable to afford expensive activity groups childhood can often be a lonely and boring time.  

This is coupled with the fact increasing numbers of children are now living in overcrowded accommodation and so, do not even have the luxury of being able to play imaginative games inside. 

What are we doing to our children? 

Is the epidemic of mental health and anxiety problems in the young a coincidence? 

I say a community ignoring the needs of children is no community at all.  

New housing estates seem to be built on the premise that grass verges are all the public green space that is needed. 

How about a space based along the idea of a village green in the centre? 

How about spaces which encourage den building and where ball games are encouraged? 

What is the worse that could happen?

Maybe the odd window will be broken, perish the thought, but I tell you this, it is much easier and cheaper to fix broken windows than broken adults who are the result of miserable childhoods. 

Our children have enough problems to contend with poverty, exams, school work, peer pressure, cyber bullying and knowing they are growing up in a world where they are likely to be worse off than their parents. Trying to keep them from public spaces is just another way we fail to enrich them.  


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Family Court Decisions Are Breaking My Child By The Masked Avenger

Author Anonymous 

Children in the UK are struggling with emotions and left voiceless whilst their parents fight it out in front of a judge in family court. 

My experience is children’s wishes and wellbeing are actually ignored in favour of the child having a relationship with both parents. 

Don’t get me wrong I am all for children having a relationship with both parents but when it distresses, upsets and harms our children where do we turn to?

Until they reach age 10 a child is practically voiceless in a family court. 

The court will and does disregard the child and discredit any emotions the child shows just because the judge feels they know best. They do not. 

In my experience the child was left needing a lot of therapy,  very withdrawn and distressed. The child spoke to me time and time again begging, crying, saying “why won’t they listen to me?”

That’s a good question. We are all human and we all are supposed to have ‘human rights ‘ yet a court is willing to destroy a child because they believe it is best for a child to have the contact which they grant everyday. They go home to their comfortable lives and what about the child? They are left crying, with questions that the parent cannot answer, they are left emotionally harmed with nightmares and being packed off to the other parent . 

The suffering that a child goes through is immense. We are in a world where we are dictated to enough without our children being forced to have contact. I have had a child crying on the floor, sobbing because they do not want to leave and all I can do is say  ” I know you don’t want to go, I know this is upsetting you but you must go”.

I fought for a few years in family court for my child to have their voice heard. Nobody heard them and I am the one who picks them up everyday when their emotions are all over the place. I am the one who comforts and tries to make the best of a bad situation.
I feel that the courts need to ‘judge’ each case individually and actually listen to the children. I’m all for a balanced view and equal relationship with both parents if the child is happy with that. 

Why are we breaking the children of the UK?

Why do we dismiss them?

Childhood is a precious time meant for building up a child not breaking them down.

Children’s mental health is so important and I’m not saying let a child have their own way but when a child tells you time and time again they do not want to have contact; we the parent are pretty powerless because the court does not listen.

We are at risk of having a lot of children with self esteem issues and anxiety because the one who holds the power is a judge who despite reports by many will disregard them in an instant. 

We need to listen to the children because they grow up and we don’t need any more damaged adults on the hands of an already stretched mental health services.


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Theresa May: Childcare Thief

In what world is it ok to forcibly sell somebody else’s product and then refuse to give the original owner what it cost for that product? I’m going to use an analogy most parents like me will appreciate: wine!

Imagine the scenario: I walk into the corner shop with my friend after promising to buy her a bottle of wine, I pick up a nice hearty red costing £6.30, take it to the counter and tell the shop worker that I’m only paying £5 for the wine. The store owner comes along to tell me that they can’t sell the wine at this price because they couldn’t continue to run an effective business, meet the cost of wages, overheads etc if they were to do so. I leave the £5 on the counter, take the wine, give it to my friend as the kind gift I originally offered.

Would you expect either the friend or shop owner to be happy with this outcome? No!

Sure, your friend now has a bottle of wine which they’ve not had to pay for but they feel guilty, in some way responsible for the injustice which has been committed against the shop owner. They might want to pay the difference but be unable to. They might want to give the wine back and go without.

While my friend is making her decision, the police have also been called as what I have done is clearly theft. There’s no ambiguity here; I just stole from the corner shop.

But what if it wasn’t wine? What if it was childcare which was promised as a gift? What if you can’t offer to pay the difference or give the ‘gift’ back to the business owner because without it you can’t afford to work or cover your own bills and outgoings? What then?

This is exactly what is happening all over the country. How is it ok?

A product (childcare), has been forcibly taken and handed out to thousands of families across the country as a nice gift, but the providers are not being given the going rate for their service leaving them on average 20% short.

This isn’t a gift, it’s theft!

Like the shop owner, the nurseries should call the police, right? Unfortunately, the perpetrators in this instance, the thieves, the villain, is the government of this country and there is nothing the victims of this theft can do.

The Telegraph has today reported: “One in five providers surveyed by the National Day Nurseries Association, a childcare charity, are not offering the free 30 hours because they say they cannot afford it. And more than half of those that are participating in the scheme are having to increase parents’ costs.”

The Pre-school Learning Alliance conducted a survey of childcare providers in March 2017 which showed similar results: “Less than half of providers [are] currently planning to roll out the offer, and a quarter saying that it is “likely” they will close”.

The situation is set to get worse. The government’s plan to freeze early years funding until 2019-20 will leave us with an even bigger problem on our hands. Childcare providers will feel the squeeze even more as running costs continue to rise with inflation whilst funding does not.

If everyone is happy with the nation’s children being looked after by the least experienced and qualified staff to keep down staffing costs. Happy with younger, even less experienced staff, to avoid paying the so-called ‘living wage’. Happy with buildings and equipment being updated and maintained less regularly. Happy for lower cost materials, foods, nappies to be used for our children during their most important years developmentally, then we have no problem here. I expect for most people, they wouldn’t be happy for any of these things to become commonplace.

Dear friend, don’t offer me a bottle of wine (especially in order to buy my friendship) if you can’t afford to buy a bottle of wine. Or at least humbly admit that you’re unable to follow through on your kind offer, but please don’t steal the wine.

Dear Conservative Government, don’t offer to provide me with 30 hours free childcare (especially to compete with Ed Milliband’s Labour promise and win my vote) if you can’t afford to pay for 30 hours of childcare at the going rate. Or at least humbly admit that you’re unable to follow through on your kind offer, but please don’t steal the childcare.